The thought of being dependent on someone else freaks me out.
My need to be independent has been a sore subject in my house for a long time. My husband foolishly thinks this is a reflection on him as a man and as a provider but it’s not that at all. I don’t know if this has come through or not before, but I have serious trust issues. I don’t believe that I can fully rely on anyone else to take care of me. I think this is part of why I never became a SAHM. The thought of having to rely on my husband’s income, and his income alone, makes me queasy. We all know what he did to me. What if I had decided to divorce him? What would I have done for money? Even though my job isn’t the most desirable, it’s still my job and my paycheck. Although…
…there are some things in the works that may make me have to really work on my issues. I’m not pregnant (we all know that can’t happen) and I’m still working full-time (even though I have a huge desire to change that). Without saying too much, there may come a day in the not so distant future where I may have to rely on my husband’s income and his income alone (that is, until my blog takes off and I’m hugely successful). As someone who, as an adult, has always taken care of herself, I’m beyond anxious and nervous about this scenario. But maybe it’s good to shake things up a bit.
Last week I departed from my rock roots to give you a country song for Money Tune Tuesday. Now I’m really departing from them. To salute my independence (regardless of the shaky state it’s in), I’ve chosen Destiny’s Child’s “Independent Women” for today’s Money Tune: